Tuesday, August 25, 2009

SportsPants Sort Of Fantasy Football Preview- Running Backs

Yes, I admit it. I'm a fantasy football dork. I check out the lists and try to pick the team that will greatest chance of winning me an imaginary trophy.

Then there are others like my girlfriend who's sole goal in a fantasy draft is to get her favorite kicker and to get someone she finds cute/funny/fat. She refuses to draft Baltimore Ravens because they are thugs and she would pass on Randy Moss even if he was guaranteed to get 27 touchdowns next season.

I'm beginning to think she's got the better way because fantasy football is often about luck. Luck with injuries, luck with weather, luck with not losing in the playoffs. So you might as well draft a team you're interested in following throughout the season. After all, what fun is fantasy football if you don't like to watch the players you drafted?

Here's a list of running backs who might be interesting to watch this season:

1. Adrian Peterson- He's the top pick of most drafts, so your chances of getting him are nil, but just check this video out:

That's a freakin marble statue running at you. The mere sight of Peterson makes defensive players truckle and go hide under a bench somewhere. I don't care if it sounds gay, that man is a beast. Too bad he went to Oklahoma in college which requires me to hate him.

2. Maurice Jones-Drew- There is so very little not to like about MJD. He has three names, he's only 5'6" and just over 200 pounds, yet he levels blitzing linebackers that are twice his size. He wears number 32 because he wasn't drafted in the first round, so he wants to remind himself that every one of the 32 NFL teams passed him over at least once. His nickname is Pocket Hercules.

If that isn't enough, here's a story for you: one time while he was playing a game at UCLA, Maurice's grandfather had a heart attack while watching the game. MJD's coach broke the news to him on the sideline during the game and Jones Drew ran right back to the locker room and went to the hospital. I don't know about you, but I get images of Forrest Gump running straight out of an exit in full uniform when he finds out his mama is sick. You really should draft Jones Drew if you can.

3. LaDanian Tomlinson- He was the NFL MVP two years ago when he set an NFL record for touchdowns scored. Then he had an injury-filled season last year (which was still a good year by most standards, just not his). Now fantasy people treat him like a lepor because he's 30 years old and running back lose their mojo quickly. He swears last year was a fluke and he's put to prove people wrong. Will he? You can find out through the season.

If that's not good enough, how about his giving spirit: every time he has a home game, Tomlinson donates tickets so that 21 under-privledged kids can attend the game (his jersey number is 21). That's not all though, after the game, Tomlinson take them out for dinner and a night on the town and at the end of the night, each kid gets a goody bag full of school supplies for the year. Still not convinced? How about the fact that he and his wife get up every Thanksgiving to hand out food to the poor? He's a decent human, grab him.

4. Marion Barber III- Marion the Barbarian or MB3 is the NFL man of mystery. He's on the high-profile Dallas Cowboys, yet he respectfully declines all interviews. When he is interviewed, he answers with a simple "yes sir" or "no sir". To calm down, he quietly plays the piano. Well. Yet behind closed doors, he's one of the biggest practical jokers on the team (according to sources on the inside.) He's known to sneak behind the microphone in the equipment room and make outlandish announcements or make any assortment of sarcastic comments during film sessions. You'll never hear about it from him though because unlike every other player on the Cowboys, Barber isn't constantly looking for a television camera.

5. Darren McFadden- No wonderous story surrounding this guy, but he's super talented and he's on the Raiders which means there is always a potential for him to punch a teammate or coach. Or maybe he'll be punched by the coach. Either way, it should interesting to follow him because at least once you'll read news about the Raiders that makes your jaw drop.

6. Lendale White- Fatty Mcbutterpants lost tons of weight this off-season simply by giving up his tequila habit. We'll see if lasts the season away from the sauce.

So there are some running backs you might be interested in taking this year. May you grab players that you at least enjoy because you're team is just an injury or two away from sucking.

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