PantsCast May 31 2011

The NBA Finals, an icy move, a star moves, and the demise of the seater vest. Plus, civil rights talk on What's Wrong With Humans.

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Evidence In The NBA Vs NHL Not Really Battle

I've been singing the NHL's praises for years now. It's playoffs are vastly more entertaining than the NBA's and unlike it's round ball counterpart, different teams actually win championships. So while the Lakers and Celtics are battling to see which team has the most spoiled fans in the sport, the Blackhawks are trying to win their first Stanley Cup since 1961 against a Flyers team that hasn't won one since the mid-1970's.

Of course, my arguments/pleas generally fall on deaf ears. I understand. You don't get hockey. You didn't grow up watching it. You have no idea why the announcers are talking about the cycle game or what the difference between roughing, cross-checking, and boarding is. Why the hell did the ref just blow the whistle? Who did what to who?

I grew up in Texas. I've been on ice skates maybe five times in my life. I don't have a clue how to skate backwards or how to change directions at all, let alone gracefully.

You just need to feel the electricity in the air. Hockey fans are crazy. Their intensity gets pushed up to 11 during the chase for the Stanley Cup. It's exactly what you're missing from football: intense, hard-hitting battles of the will.

Don't take my word for it though. Here is a comparison of the National Anthem and introductions between the NBA Finals and Stanly Cup.

First, the NBA:




I know it's an L.A. crowd, but that's my argument against the NBA. It's always an L.A. crowd. Or a San Antonio crowd, or a Chicago or Boston. No other fans have had a chance to see the Finals from their home floor (yes, Detroit fans, I know your team has been there.)

On the other hand, here are the Chicago fans during the National Anthem:



The energy difference is like comparing a light bulb to the sun. But don't take my word for it. Just watch for yourself.

Ho Hum

Oh look, the Celtics are playing the Lakers for an NBA championship.

Again.

These two teams have met for a title 11 different times (Celtics have won nine, mostly during their dominant run in the 60's.) Even when they aren't playing each other, one of these teams is usually in the championship hunt. Boston has 17 titles while the Lakers have 15.

32 titles. 32? How long has the NBA been a major player in sports, 50 years? That's ridiculous.

Imagine two NFL teams being responsibly for 70% of all Super Bowl titles. Would that get a little old maybe? The Pats have only won three titles this decade and people are sick of them. The Dallas Cowboys showed up in five Super Bowls in the 1970's and became the loved/hated America's Team.

As annoyingly dominant as the Yankees have been in baseball, you can at least name five or six teams off the top of your head that have won the World Series besides the overpaid boys in pinstripes. Plus, baseball stretches back to the pre-depression era, so there is a much bigger sample size to work with.

The point is that unless you live in Boston or Los Angeles, you enjoy watching sports dynasties win multiple championships, or you're a front-runner, this act is getting old.

It will be a good match-up, but what are we rooting for? Either way, one team's annoying and spoiled fan base will beat their chests and behave in such a generally arrogant way, you'll want to throw up. Wow, that sounds great, and while we're at it, can we get Donald Trump some more television time?

If you're hard up for championship sports right now, try something new. Watch the Stanley Cup finals in the NHL.

Two teams with passionate fan bases are trying for thier first championship in a generation. They've already played two games and both have been classics. The Chicago crowd has been so excitable, they're roaring as the National Anthem was being played. You can bet the Flyers fans will return the energy as the series switches venues.

I don't want to hear that you don't understand hockey. I grew up in Dallas, I knew nothing about it. You'll catch on quickly. And then you'll understand it's greatness.

As for the NBA, call me when something new happens.

So Far So Good

As I sit here writing while my girlfriend gives me running commentary on the Oscars (something about "vapid" and Miley Cyrus, but Kate Winslet apparently looks beautiful), I can't help but think of hockey. I know, obvious connection, right?

The big question following the Olympics was if the exciting gold medal game between Canada and the United States would cause an increase in the NHL ratings. I'm not sure the NHL can ever pull in extra numbers, but the league took a nice step forward this weekend by showing a classic between the Detroit Red Wings and Chicago Blackhawks. The game was a back and forth thriller that ended with Detroit winning 5-4 only after withstanding a brutal last minute Chicago assault on the net.

If you didn't find that game interesting, you either aren't a sports fan, or you drank just a bit too much wine at church. This is exactly what the NHL needs.

Half of this country doesn't understand hockey and another faction doesn't care. On the other side, there is a group of fans who want the game to stay the same as it always has complete with fights, grabbing, holding, and pile ups in the middle of the ice.

The rest of us are people that just want to see an entertaining sport which hockey can obviously be. At it's best, the sport is an ultra fast display of grace and power. There is always a chance for a score to happen, yet the goals are few enough that each score means something. There is nothing quite like the fire drill in front of a goalie's net when there is a loose puck around. The change in momentum can be swift and brutal as a scoring chance at one end can instantaneously become a fast break the other direction.

That's why it's nice to see the Red Wings and Blackhawks put on a show. If there are any post Olympic types hanging around to see some more hockey, they have a reason to stick around a bit longer.

Just make it to the playoffs, folks. Then you're in for a real treat.

Bad News Bears On Ice

It'd be hilarious if it weren't so scary at first. Florida Panthers goalie Tomas Vokoun gets beat by a goal...and that's the high point of the next minute. After the goal, Panthers defender Keith Ballard gets so frustrated he tries to break his stick over the goal. The only problem was that Vokoun's head got in the way.

This is something straight out of the movie Slapshot.




Merry Christmas?

Smart Or Just Shady?

Have you or one of your friends ever lost a job or been passed over for a promotion? Usually we assume the person who gets chosen is either young and cheap or they have some sort of relationship with the boss.

Nepotism has long been one of the most prominent and often louche parts of business operations. Sports is full of it; franchise owners often bring in family members to help run the business while long time executives are left on the outside looking in.

Chalk up the Chicago Blackhawks as another franchise that has dabbled with the n-word.

The hockey team has "re-assigned" (see: fired) general manager Dale Tallon less than two months after the team he built made it to the Western Conference finals, the first time the Blackhawks have seen that kind of playoff success since Vanilla Ice was popular.

In Tallon's place goes assistant general manager, 36-year-old Stan Bowman--who just happens to be the son of legendary coach and current Blackhawks senior advisor of hockey operations, Scotty Bowman. To sum up: long time general manager ousted after a successful season and replaced by the senior advisor's young son.

Let the "life's not fair" lessons begin.

Before idealists like myself fly off the handle though, there are a few details that might make Tallon's dismissal more understandable.

First, though he did build last year's successful team, Tallon has had his share of huge blunders in the free-agent market. He overpaid for several veterans that gave little in return, and just this past season he handed Marian Hossa a 12 year contract worth $62 million. That move looks great on the surface: steal talented player from arch-rival Red Wings and make your team better in the process. The problem is that Hossa is 30 years old. General sports logic says he will start declining within five years and then the Blackhawks will be stuck with a fossil who has an untradable contract.

Meanwhile, the Hossa deal forced Chicago to let Martin Havlat, last year's leading scorer, go and now young studs like Duncan Kieth, Jonathan Toews, and Patrick Kane will be much more difficult to sign. Tallon says the Hossa deal won't jeopardize the re-signing of any young Blackhawks players, but now the team may have to overpay all the you studs since it overpaid for Hossa. Owners generally don't like that kind of news.

Tallon also takes the blame for a paperwork snafu that nearly cost the Blackhawks several restricted free-agent players. (Conspiracy theorists will say he was set up, but either way, he was the general manager when this happened.) It was a stupid mistake that should never happen in professional sports. Not a real good way to keep the confidence of your boss.

Still, Blackhawks executive Rick Dudley left the team to take up a similar position with the Atlanta Thrashers a few weeks earlier. Why would an executive leave a franchise that was just one series away from the Stanly Cup finals with a young core of players in order to take up the same position with a team that has sucked forever? Maybe he saw the writing on the wall and got out while he could.

Stan Bowman could end up being a great general manager who helps put the Blackhawks over the top and bring a long awaited championship to the long suffering fans. Or maybe he just has the right D.N.A.

Something could be rotten in the state of Blackhawk.

Too Much?

If you take a casual look around interweb of sports today, you will find a story about some trash talk issued by Alex Burrows and Ryan Kesler of the Vancouver Canucks towards St. Louis Blues center David Backes.



Most of the talk is your run of the mill verbal sparring you might hear in any tense sporting contest. A bit of name calling, a little physical threat to his twig and berries, letting Backes know that Burrows and Kesler are stormy petrels who will be looking for him all game. It's all standard trash talk in an attempt to get an opposing player to stop concentrating on the game.

Then the Vancouver duo brought Backes wife into the conversation. Backes didn't seem too upset by it and the talk was passed off as just a conversation between a couple of gamers.

But when does the talk go too far (if it can)? Backes has a hot wife and he can laugh it off as a pathetic attempt at getting under his skin. Would he do the same thing if Kessler and Burrows were talking about his kids? What if he has a retarded kid that gets mentioned, or a stillborn child?

A lot can be said in the heat of the moment and you never know the length some players will go to for a competitive edge. We already saw Sean Avery get suspended this year for claiming that Calgary Flame forward Jerome Iginla was dating his "sloppy seconds" in Canadian-born actress Elisha Cuthburt (of '24' fame). Avery said it to a throng of reporters before a game in an obvious pre-meditated move.

You might pass off Avery's comments as a stupid cheap shot by a man described as the NHL's biggest pest. You might think it was funny and Cuthbert is just a hussy anyways. Or you could find the comment a disturbing example of how far someone will go to goad another player.

We don't know what is said on the field or ice, especially during the playoffs. That's the way athletes like it. Say what you want on the field as long as you leave it on the field. But now that we have audio and cameras everywhere, the talk won't stay with the players.

I'm guessing it's only a matter of time before someone goes overboard with the talk and horrifies fans prompting a league commissioner to address the situation.

Elisha Cuthbert would be happy with that.